Looking back

When I recently turned 24, the strangest feeling came upon me. I am an adult. I work full time in a real job, I'm married, most of my friends have kids, I own a home, I own a car, I go on vacations independently and so on. Then this month came, January 2010, holy crap. Where have the years gone? First of all, 2010...seriously? I remember in 2nd grade writing a paper that was titled, "Myself in 2010." The assignment was to predict where we would be and what we would be doing etc. I don't know where it is, but I remember thinking that I would be a movie star or working in an ice cream parlor of sorts.

On January 5, 2010 it was our 4th wedding anniversary. Jason and I have been together for 5 years total. Insane. It doesn't feel like it's been that long...at all.

I don't know what my deal is lately, but I have been reflecting on my life and what I want to do next. It's on my mind all of the time. I am at the point where I'm asking myself, "kids? grad school? kids? nothing? travel?...Jason, what am I gonna do with my life?" I feel like I am in a hamster wheel.

Today, I had something cross my mind...I think I am going to be finished with planning my life. It has done me little good in the past and things have worked out. For instance, I never planned on getting married at 20 years old. I never planned on becoming a nurse. I never planned on riding dirt bikes for fun. And I certainly never planned on actually enjoying "The View" and looking forward to "20/20" on Friday nights...but I do and I enjoy it. Life has taken me for a ride and I am in love with where I am at. Not saying I'm done with goal setting, just done with planning.

I am content and comfortable with who I am and who I am with.

Probably because Jason is such a gem...

Jason,

We've been together for 5 years!

I remember our wedding day, and how I knew without a doubt that you were the love of my life. However, a lifetime was not enough, so we were married for time and all eternity.



Our first trip as a married couple. We were both in college full time and working full time, so we went on a quick trip to Mexico and called it a "honeymoon." I'm still waiting for my real one...


We adopted our first puppy together and named him Boris. He is our baby, and he is snuggling with me on the couch as I type this. You initially thought that he was going to be a tough little guard dog...so much for that. We were so excited.

You have been obsessed with baseball and The White Sox for just about your entire life. So, we finally went to your first Sox game together, and you were glowing. It was so fun being there with you...even though one side of my body got sun-burned. Remember? I looked like two-face from batman...I think that is his name. You got to see your favorite player, Frank Thomas, and we sat next to that cute little girl and her Dad. It was her first White Sox game too. It was then, that you started looking forward to taking your own kids to baseball games...

Later that year, it snowed in Mesa for the first time in my entire life! I woke you up from a deep sleep and we drove to Higley Rd in order to play in the snow. You were and still are such a good sport. We took a picture with this palm tree, because we thought it was awesome. Snow on a palm tree? I have to admit, it still makes me a bit excited.
This was only the first year of being married. Little did I know, how happy I would be years down the road. Life hasn't been perfect, but of course it hasn't. I look back on my life with you and smile. You are my best friend and I love you. Cheers to 4 years of marriage!